It hurt, the way people would come up to me out of nowhere and ask me who I was after I had finished singing. It hurt when my leader would tell me of people asking him the same question some Sundays. And I don't know how to explain the hurt except to say, I wished I could be faithful to my "yes" answer and not be seen.
I thought I had to hide beneath something. I thought if someone gave me a compliment, I must have been standing in their way to having time with God. I kept asking God to make me smaller until my prayer sounded more like "make me invisible".
"So now you feel invisible, Amy. Is this what you meant when you prayed that? I didn't call you to be invisible. Humility is one thing but your prayer turned to pride when all you could think about was how uncomfortable you felt. YOU. You sing your praise to me and give me your time and energy to do these things I have asked of you but don't you see? I need YOU. I need you to be OK with being seen or even being known. I need you to be who you are. Be fully you and move fully in my leading ~ whether they see you or not ~ whether they know who you are or not . Will you be mine? Are you willing to let me shine through you and be a living testimony to others? Will you set your heart on me and set your hands to the work I've asked and let the rest of this go?