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Sunday, January 1, 2017

This Poor/Rich Girl & My #oneword For 2017

I've been wanting to share this story since the day {I feel} it really began. And as much as I wanted to share it, I felt like it wasn't time yet. Then as I lived through it and saw it unfolding, I really wanted to share what was going on. Again, I felt it wasn't time yet.
Today, I feel like I finally have grace to tell the story. So to begin, back up with me to the month of November - the beginning of what we call the "Holiday Season".

Each month, my hubster and I sit down and look at the budget. A lot of it is really just about the same from month to month. We pay our bills, school tuition, swim class tuition, etc. etc. And every month, we try and come up with money to roll over into paying down our debts. In November, though, we had a chilling conversation that led to my husband saying he didn't want any gifts this Christmas because he wanted to make sure we had the money to take care of everyone else.

It doesn't necessarily matter how we got to that point, financially. We chose to give money we had saved to something else that was very worthy of every penny and we had no regrets about that. But. The fact remained...we were between a rock and a hard spot.

Here's where I'm going to be really honest with you all. I was so upset to hear my husband say that he was going to forego gifts for himself but I was so glad he didn't ask me to join him. I have a birthday and Christmas in December and my love language is gifts. So. Given that bit of information, y'all can guess how much I love December.

In the interim - Before this conversation and afterward, I have been spending hours a day seeking to grow my relationship with God by listening to teachings, reading scripture, and praying. I saw amazing things happening in my own life and almost wiped the sweat from my brow calling it "favor" that I was not being asked to give anything up in terms of gifts.

That is

until the day I was being asked to give up birthday and Christmas gifts.

No, the hubster didn't sit me down again after our chat at the beginning of November. This is something that came to me in prayer and it was very clear. "I want you to tell your husband to not get you anything for your birthday or Christmas".  I was tempted to not believe what I was hearing in my heart but that lasted only a moment. I knew that I had to go to him and tell him.

Well, of course, I was crying as soon as I got the words "There's something I need to tell you" out of my mouth. And I made sure to tell him that I was crying because this entitlement was being broken off of me. I didn't want him thinking I was sad about it. I wasn't sad. I was sure. But in my brokenness, I couldn't help but cry.

And so, we moved into planning to host Thanksgiving and choosing gifts to purchase for our family. The hubster took the day off work for my birthday and we spent time together and grabbed a bite for lunch. That was {ugh...I'm going to cry}    it was the best birthday I can remember having in a long, long time. The day was so very rich for me. I was grateful for everything in a brand new way because I didn't hold the wonder of what I would get at the forefront of my mind. My best gifts {my man and my kiddos} were right there in my home that morning and as I walked around midtown Detroit hand in hand with my husband, I couldn't help but beam and live in pure joy.







In fact, a lot of December was lived just like that. I was full of joy but it was out of obedience and sacrifice that my eyes were opened to the very many gifts I have around me every single day.

Christmas Day was blessed as well. I was part of leading worship at my church on Christmas Eve and was given some beautiful and generous gifts from other family members on Christmas. The difference was this. I had already learned to be content and see all the gifts around me so when I was given something outside of those daily gifts, I accepted them in a new way. I spent time looking at each thing, really appreciating it and the thoughtfulness of the person who gave it to me. There were no feelings of entitlement to fight with & when someone would ask me what I wanted, I made sure to think of things I can use all the time while thinking of and praying for the person who gave it to me.

This leads in to my One Word for 2017 just perfectly. My word this year is "Abundance". To be honest, I was struggling to accept this because it sounded like such a creature comfort word and God had just walked me through a humbling and broken season. But then I felt Him tell me not to be afraid of that word. See, the breaking I experienced had taught me what riches lie in wait when I seek Him and am satisfied in the things He daily provides. It has nothing to do with "stuff".  Abundance for me doesn't mean earthly wealth. Abundance is living the rich life, spiritually, and going from glory to glory in my walk with God.

I'm looking so forward to what will unfold in the year to come.

What is your One Word for 2017??

~Amy

2 comments:

  1. Great to read your story. Thanks for sharing it and your word. Love the definition: https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/us/abundance.

    My word for 2017 is "discipline". This the first year I have picked a word. Read my story: http://srjf.blogspot.co.uk/2016/12/my-one-word-for-2017-discipline-and-my.html.

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  2. I love how God gently leads us into obedience and opens our eyes to the beauty all around us. Perfect word! My word for 2017 is Commit. Blessings!

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