Today, I'm joining with some crazy, brave and inspiring women at the blog of Lisa Jo Baker. Each Friday she gives a prompt and with that prompt, writers write for 5 minutes with no second-guessing. Just writing what comes to them. Then, they share and encourage each other. What a great {and scary} idea.
I'm joining in and challenging you to do the same! Today's prompt is "Song"
Ready? Go!
From the time I was small, until the day I met my {now} husband, life had been almost impossibly difficult for me. When I was just 5 years old, abuse showed up in my life...except no one, not even I, knew that it was there. It was subtle...a slow, slow process. Subtle enough to fly under the radar.
I think now that my heart must have tuned in to what was happening, even if my brain hadn't caught up. I began to have nightmares. They didn't come all the time, but when they came they were the most horrible of dreams. I would wake up wailing and calling out for my mom.
She would show up.
She always did.
She would stroke my curly hair away from my face and sing. She would sing until that big, deep sigh would come to let her know I was relaxed. Then she would wash my face with a warm cloth and say to me "Now, let's paint a picture. Where do you want to meet Jesus?" Together, we would create this perfect scene and I would go back to sleep with a smile.
She had no idea, no clue that I was having nightmares because someone in my life was pure evil. If I would have known to say something, I would have. But she knew the song to sing and she knew to walk me to Jesus so I could rest. Perhaps if she did know, she wouldn't have handled it quite the same.
I needed those songs. And you know? I remember 2 times when heaven came right to me as a child. One night, I couldn't sleep and my mom prayed that the angels would sing me a lullaby. They did. My heart could hear an entire choir and they didn't sing a single word...they just let out a song in their voice. I think they always sing like that. Another time, I didn't call for anyone when I woke up. I just said the words "Jesus, let's paint a picture". The next morning I told my mom about how He came to me and I laughed with Him and He carried me on His shoulders.
A child in silent, no one knows about it abuse needed those songs. And today, I cry from the beauty of those moments. The times I can see God with me, even through the ugliest of circumstances.
Always singing. Always with me.
Ready? Go!
From the time I was small, until the day I met my {now} husband, life had been almost impossibly difficult for me. When I was just 5 years old, abuse showed up in my life...except no one, not even I, knew that it was there. It was subtle...a slow, slow process. Subtle enough to fly under the radar.
I think now that my heart must have tuned in to what was happening, even if my brain hadn't caught up. I began to have nightmares. They didn't come all the time, but when they came they were the most horrible of dreams. I would wake up wailing and calling out for my mom.
She would show up.
She always did.
She would stroke my curly hair away from my face and sing. She would sing until that big, deep sigh would come to let her know I was relaxed. Then she would wash my face with a warm cloth and say to me "Now, let's paint a picture. Where do you want to meet Jesus?" Together, we would create this perfect scene and I would go back to sleep with a smile.
She had no idea, no clue that I was having nightmares because someone in my life was pure evil. If I would have known to say something, I would have. But she knew the song to sing and she knew to walk me to Jesus so I could rest. Perhaps if she did know, she wouldn't have handled it quite the same.
I needed those songs. And you know? I remember 2 times when heaven came right to me as a child. One night, I couldn't sleep and my mom prayed that the angels would sing me a lullaby. They did. My heart could hear an entire choir and they didn't sing a single word...they just let out a song in their voice. I think they always sing like that. Another time, I didn't call for anyone when I woke up. I just said the words "Jesus, let's paint a picture". The next morning I told my mom about how He came to me and I laughed with Him and He carried me on His shoulders.
A child in silent, no one knows about it abuse needed those songs. And today, I cry from the beauty of those moments. The times I can see God with me, even through the ugliest of circumstances.
Always singing. Always with me.
